Childrens’ discussion is a reflection of their surrounding people, parents or elders. In this regard children use these sentences to gain attention too which elders often say. In this regard the parents become dumbfounded.
Child is an image of his/her parents. He/she learns every basic act of life from his/her house. In our religion when a child is born azan, meaning the name of Allah, is said in his ears. So that when the child should listen to the first word of his life, he/she would remember the name of his/her creator. In his ears parent’s sentences, conversations, and swear words also enter. This is all a matter of input and output. Whatever is the input to the ears of the child, the same things would come out of his/her lips as output. Whatever the child learns from his/her elders becomes inscribed on his/her mind. And then irrespective of the occasion, the same words get uttered from his/her mouth.
Fear is inclusive in human instinct. The child is scared from the first day from bad things and bad deeds from an early age. ”Do not do this otherwise Allah will come..... or if you do this Allah will punish you.” Similarly if some truth is sought from the mouth of the child, the elders ask him/her to swear upon Allah. As the child grows older, he/she starts forgetting the fear of Allah. Because the child thinks that on the mistakes and follies he has made, Allah will never come.
But he/she uses the swear upon Allah to save and secure him/her. In a small age explaining the perils of lying to a child is as if to climb the peak of himalaya. Thus, whenever the child mischief’s, he/she takes the support of renunciation by swearing and lying. If there are many children in the house and their age differences are less then their mutual disputes and acts of badmouthing each other becomes clear like a reflection for their parents. And when the parents hear swear words, swearing and foul language from the mouths of their 4–10 years old children, they come to know that their inattentiveness and ignorance has raised the water above the heads. ”What is the benefit of regretting now when the birds have eaten the entire field.” And like this to save their children from badmouthing becomes a hard nut to crack. And then by thinking about this they indulge in the grooming of children that even though it has been late but perhaps it is not too late. Have you parents ever thought about this angle? If not, then keep an eye on your children from today. And observe that where have you made a mistake. Have your children learnt this badmouthing from you?
Childrens’ discussion, as it has been described above, is a reflection of their surrounding people, parents or elders. In this regard children use these sentences to gain attention too. Which elders often utter. In this regard the parents become dumbfounded. They are very careful and responsible about the grooming of their children. The parents do not have option other than the fact that they seek professional help from a psychologist. Parents mutual haggling, slandering, badmouthing, or saying bad to each other in the state of anger, not only frightens the children, rather they repeat these words unconsciously in the phase of mental tension. And when they become angry about something they repeat these words. Experts call this type of a behavior as conduct disorder.
2.1 Mental Stress Makes the Children Narrow-minded
Children make use of bad behavior and bad language despite a lot of control of parents and teachers. In this case the child learns other bad habits other than swearing too. Research suggests that in this type of children the level of new chemicals lessens and that gives rise to these problems. Mental stress, sadness and insecurity make the children narrow-minded. Psychologists call this behavior an unhealthy attitude of the children which they use to cope with unprecedented situations. This proves very effective in distorting their personalities. They call this distortion of the personality as Tic Disorder.
It has two separate symptoms. In the first symptom the child exhibits a brisk physical reaction. Meaning to strike physically or to slap. And the other is vocaltics in which the child repeats words again and again the meaning of which he/she him/her-self does not know. A remedy of these symptoms is impossible for the parents. They should definitely show the child to a psychologist or a consultant. Those parents who do not possess the means to pay huge fees to the psychologists or the consultants, there are a few instructions for them. But first have a look at the bad habits of the child. You should have full knowledge of the bad effects of media on the children. Children have an inclination to copy their elders or their favorite heroes. So much so that they like to copy their favorite cartoon characters. Children learn a lot of their habits from their maids, school bus drivers, maids working in the house. And like this they can also learn bad words from their neighbors too.
2.2 Even Civilized Parents Can Be Cynically Blunt
Many civilized parent are also cynically blunt. They reward their servants and drivers with abusive words. From which the children also learn the use of these words.
For its remedy first of all that bad language would have to be stopped which you use with others. Meaning the one that you use with drivers, servants or your neighbors. First of all explain the meanings of these words to your children. Tell them that these words are very bad. And that if they used these words again, they will be severely punished.
Make the child realize that it is alright to be angry, but in the state of anger the other person cannot be addressed with bad words or names. In this regard one should give a demonstration to the children in the state of anger. Tell him that even in this state how the situation can be elegantly controlled. Also tell him that using bad phrases and bad words, others hearts break.
Use nice and loving words yourself and teach them to the children too. If the children are using any bad words in the state of anger, you should stop them with a cool-minded attitude. First of all give him/her a glass of water and have him/her sit down and relax. Like this he would have help in controlling the anger and slowly discourage him/her for his/her words.
Give the child good books to read. Stories and anecdotes full of advice are very helpful in teaching many good things to the children. Present good role models to the children. In copying them they would also try to become good role models.
