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Psychological domestic tensions and tested guaranteed remedies

Ubqari Magazine - November 2015

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Nobody loves me: I remain sick all the time. I look weak, I am unable to get rid of sickness despite having undergone rigorous treatment. I remain occupied with my own thoughts. Nobody helps me in household chores. And no body appreciates me when I do household chores all alone. Siblings misbehave me and nobody stops them. My family doesn’t love me that is why they treat me like this. My family calls me mad and the names alike. I have also undergone psychological treatment. I don’t remember having spent some good years ever in my life.                                                                                 (Nazo, Rawalpindi)

Answer: Emotional feelings impact physical health a lot. In anger, face gets red and heart beats faster. Some people start trembling when angry. You start feeling sick when you are downhearted. This is all your mental disposition that you are still sick despite of the rigorous treatment you have undergone. It seems you don’t want to feel yourself better. That is why your are not improving. Perpetually ill people evade responsibilities. Sometimes this evasion is involuntary and when such people are told their so called sickness they mind it. You yourself will have to do it; all of it. Start feeling yourself better. Stay happy. Appreciate yourself. Gain mental peace. Don’t expect from people. Respect others to get respected. Don’t meddle in others’ affairs. Ignore people if they say you anything. Believe in yourself that you are not insane. Life itself never gets beautiful, you have to feel that life is beautiful.


Could not secure position in exams:

I have been position holder till eighth class. Due to some problems I could not secure remarkable position in matriculation exams, and this snatched all the keenness I once had for studies. I have taken second year examination of intermediate. I want to study B.Com (Bachleors of commerce). I want to secure position as I have been securing. It seems that I would not secure a position despite of hard work.                             (Kalsoom, Multan)

Answer: What is it you cannot achieve by hard work. And it is comparatively easier for a person like you because you have been securing position throughout your academic career. You must have realized that one has to study a lot. You are an intelligent student by Almighty Allah’s grace. Try again and try harder, you will secure a position or good grades otherwise. Hard work always rewards, all you need is determination.


Bogey tales

Few days back my maternal aunt who lives in lndia came Lahore to spend a month with us. Since she loves children a lot, children would encircle her in evening and listen bogey tales. Her bogey tales were too interesting that children would prefer listening bogey tales to TV. Now she has gone to India. Children miss her. But there is a problem that children have started fearing darkness. They ask me to be there with them all the time in their room. And during power failure they scream. I am much afraid of this situation, I wonder if they would ever shed off this fear as they grow up.                                                      (Shazia, Lahore)

Answer: It seems the bogey tales your maternal aunt has been narrating to children were about darkness and when it gets dark children get frightened. Now it is upto you to decimate this fear. Ask them politely what is it they are afraid of. And when they tell you about those tales, tell them that those tales were just tales, all fake. Use torch or candle during power failure and tell them there is nothing to get afraid of. If you help them shedding their fear off at this stage, it, definitely, will not grow with them.


I feel sorry: I have passed matriculation exams this year and I feel sorry for not getting admission in a good college due to less marks. I worked hard and revised books many time. I played and visited friends for a very little time. I studied all the time. I would study late at night and also early in morning. I am disheartened over working hard and getting less marks. Now how can I get good marks in intermediate so that I may get admission in a university. Securing A grade is must due to tight competition these days.         (Farman Ali, Quetta)

Answer: We have a strange psychological perception regarding exams prevalent in our country. That is why students, whatever class they study in, look perplexed. Excelling in exams is an art. Weak nerved students who appear in exams can do marvels when they take exams after studying with utmost devotion. Working all the time, keeping oneself away from recreational activities withdraws fun from life. One memorizes a lot by studying sitting alone after a peaceful sleep at night.


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