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When the kids of modern mothers grew up destruction was caused in society!

Ubqari Magazine - March 2019

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Problems started in the society when the mothers of this young generation were those whose parents spent their lives under restriction and as soon as they got married they got out of control. Started wearing sleeveless clothes, music and considered every civil thing backward became fans of love marriages and forgot about Islamic values.

Respected hazarat hakeem sahib! We diligently read ubqari magazine on monthly basis. It saddens me a lot when I read about the distressed parents in ‘hal e dil’ column of the magazine. We have witnessed some incidents as well. My experience says that (1) there is no harm in earning foreign exchange but for Godsakes please don not spend too much on your kids. Teach them to work hard, give them good education don’t give them all the money at once infact save for them (2)  first take care of your years of retirement, a place to live , medical expenses, never show to your kids how much money you have (3) no matter how rich you are keep the Haq Mehr of your son or daughter according to shariah. Later you could transfer a house in their name if you wish. If the son or daughter plan to settle abroad then without giving them any details keep some aside for them in a bank. Otherwise greedy people won’t leave you (4) teach your children about Islamic values and keep them away from modernity. But do not stop them from activities which are not harmful. For example if they are good in their studies and offer their salah on time then there is no harm in playing video games. Teach them to respect their elders and be kind to the young ones and do good deeds for others as well.

Amongst the people will know there was a widow who sold her two houses to get her kids educated in London. She spent millions on dowry and weddings of her kids. She now lives in an apartment all alone, for a short while her son and daughter in law also stayed with her but her daughter in law was very disrespectful, extravagant and fond of vacationing abroad. When the mother used to complain to her son he would become very disrespectful and even raise his hand on her. Mother got sick and tired of this and rented out a flat of her own. She is sick now and the kids never bothered calling her. A maid comes in from time to time for cleaning and cooks meagre food for her and stole a lot of stuff. Whenever possible the neighbours would help her but it was not possible daily. The millions worth dowry that she had given to her daughters were taken away by their in laws because they settled abroad with their husbands. The daughter in laws came empty handed but winged everything out of their husbands, they filled there home with jewellery, crockery, furniture. And the husbands so smitten with their wives got them everything. In abroad especially in America there are compounds built for old people in which small vilbs are built for them. In the compound there is supermarket, medical clinics, cinemas, different courses are taught and food shops are available. According to the health café is available where fresh juice and food is available at reasonable price. In the very same compound there are nurses, bus services and many more facilities available. Such facilities are very much needed in Pakistan. In the last month’s magazine I read about a person who faced same problem. He spent a lot of money on his kids and they kicked him out of the house. He complains that maybe he did not teach his kids about Islamic teachings that’s why this happened to him but the above mentioned lady is very pious. She got her kids to perform Hajj and Umrah and encouraged them to offer salah five times. But her sons got modern advance wives they had no interest in anything except travelling, food and spending. To keep their wives happy her sons became cruel and disrespectful. When the wives are constantly feeding them wrong information. The husbands also get affected and they tend towards evil deeds. Such defects are produced in the society because the mothers of this youth were those women whose parents spent the life of restriction and the mothers became unrestrained after their marriage, sleeveless clothes, musical parties, they started to say every decent or well- mannered things “stereotype”, fond of “love marriages” and became careless of Islamic obligations. Their children provoked evils in the society and there has been violence and obscenity at its extreme. There is only one solution of it that the parents mean the young couples should emphasize on Islamic values and higher studies so may be the situation might be better. 

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