Unfortunately, our family structure has been badly shaken since the arrival of western thinking, lifestyle and cultural invasion. This is not only a big blow to one’s home, family or society but also being a Muslim, is a big challenge to our faith and the way of life. The damage done by TV dramas can be understood by the news that in Lahore only there were one hundred divorce applications registered every day and from February 2005 to 2008, there were about 75,000 divorce suits filed in the province. These stats are for 2008 and in 2016 these numbers have gone almost twofold. A common factor among all these cases was the lack of tolerance and forbearance. If this situation remains the same then our coming generations would be badly affected and the binding fabric of the whole society will be worn out. The places where the offspring are trained to lead the world would be ruined. The spousal relationship is both important as well as delicate. If we do a deep research in into the incidents leading to the destruction of families then we will learn that the petty things which could be resolved by adopting a bit of tolerance and forbearance became the root cause of this destruction. In addition, farthing away from the life giving education that our Islamic way of live provides and the media’s poison which is being injected in the name of dramas, films, advertisements and fashion shows into the veins of our future generations has played the major role. Then another major factor is Mobile phone which causes a lethal blow to the peaceful and happy families to turn into a mess.

Dear readers! How should we save the homes from ruining?

I would like to share some experiences, observations and memories to look for the reformative steps. As we know that the parent’s qualities are transferred to their children. A few days ago, the family of a business giant as well as a significant political personality came to see me. Both sons in law were extremely rude, bad mannered and zealous of such filthy lives that neither my tongue nor even my pen is able to express. I asked them how old their father was. They said about sixty. I asked them if the father also had the similar character. They replied hesitantly but with a confessing faces in positive. I just had a sigh that what was the fault of the daughters? But I had heard from the elders that wrong done by someone else has to be borne by someone else. This world is the place of reward or punishment for one's action. Secondly the sustenance is lawful or unlawful, fair or unfair. This has a great effect on the next generations. A lawful and legitimate rizq fills the eyes, heart and emotions with modesty while the illegitimate sustenance brings the otherwise.

Thirdly the time is shared with all the mechanistic and scientific inventions including mobile , TV, cable , satellite, mixed gatherings and social mingling but there was no time left for one’s own spouse and children. When a husband does not spare his time for his wife then the husband, wife and children find their focus at some other places that lead to lack of moral grooming and ruin the family. Fourthly, the children are given a vision of becoming a doctor or an engineer from the first day of their life but are never asked to adopt kindness, forbearance and perseverance. The worst outcome of this negligence is that the daughter when becomes a daughter in law can ignite the whole home to turned into ashes or the son ruins someone else’s daughter’s life. Fifthly we tend to do religious practices and also wish to demonstrate it to others but not a single thought is given to improve our inner self and manners. The same mother in law who is the most loving for her own daughter becomes no less than a fierce beast for her daughter in law and her emotions are stone cold for her. Sixthly, the daughters are never taught to have perseverance, humility, forgiveness and forbearance as this is not a matter of just one day rather it needs ages to learn continuously. Seventhly, the mother thinks that the daughter has now turned adult and has earned many qualifications and degrees so a thought show be given to marry her but she never bothers to think if she had obtained the graduation in forbearance, the masters in forgiving, the A-level of sweet words, the M.Phil of respecting the relations and the doctorate in humility and to train her not to be arrogant and extravagant. Have we ever let our children to get qualified in these characteristics? Let us try to save our society rather than thinking everything as a conspiracy from the non Muslims. There are not only non-believers involved in conspiracy against us. We also do conspiracies against ourselves by being ignorant of these needs. If all my readers as well as myself work on it, we may overcome these challenges though it will still not be easy.